The Cat in the Booth: A Seussian report on Canada’s win in Basseterre By Steven Sandor Posted on November 18, 2018 1 0 2,669 Share on Facebook Share on Twitter PHOTO: CANADA SOCCER The sun did not shine It was too cold to play So I sat in the house Watching a stream of the game I sat there alone Watching Nations League, wahoo! And I said “How I wish Canada would score a goal or two!” The field in Basseterre was bumpy And was made for cricket, not a soccer ball And for most of the first half, Canada could not get a shot on goal at all So all I could do was Sit! Sit! Sit! Sit! And as the half wore on, I did not like it one little bit Meow! And then something meowed! How that meow had Cansoc Twitter wowed! We heard! Then we heard it again on the mic! We heard! And we heard him! The Cat in the Booth! And he meowed “Why does Canada Tweet about me like that?” “I know you will fret That a cat’s meow is not funny But maybe Canada can make A run into the box that is runny!” “I have heard about this game that humans play” Meowed the cat. “Canada should have lots of tricks,” Said the Cat in the Booth “Davies and Cavallini and Hoilett have good tricks. Maybe they will show them to you Cansoc Twitter Will not mind if they do.” The Cansoc fans did not know what to say The first half was nearly over And St. Kitts and Nevis had held us at bay But Atiba Hutchinson said “No! No! Make your worries go away! Tell that Cat in the Booth We do not want our fans to go grey We should not be tied We should be winning in a rout We should not be tied So to Russell Teibert I’ll make a shout” “Now! Now, Canada have no fear, have no fear!” Meowed the Cat “Teibert’s cross in not bad” Meowed the Cat in the Booth “Why Canada can continue its good run If Atiba can follow the ball And head it in to put Canada up by one!” “Put one down for Canada!” cried the fans. “But this cat is no fun at all! Put that cat away!” cried the fans “The cat does not belong on the broadcast at all!” “Have no fear!” meowed the Cat. “Canada will not fail They will be on top of the Nations League standings, up high As I meow into the mic! And he raised a paw And said “For the team in the white jerseys “Their future in the Nations League is no longer murky!” “Listen to me! Listen to me now!” meowed the Cat. “With a mic in my paw And a cry in my throat! I can call this game! I can say it all! Look! You’ve had Madbull and Maestro And that was funny And Benny’s store With deals that save money But this is new! This is not all! Listen to me, listen to my call!” “Listen to me! Listen to me! Listen to me NOW! It is fun to have fun. But you Canadians don’t know how. I can make fun of this game. I’ll meow more than you can take! I can call this game! And I won’t take a break! I meow as Canada holds a slim lead Well into the second half. Cavallini’s shot is deflected Canada can’t get a second I meow with the best I’m a feline force with which to be reckoned But that is not all, Oh no. That is not all…” “That is what the Cat said… As we all cheered for Canada RED But Canada made us worried From out there at Warner Park And I watched the stream And just wanted Canada to hit the mark (for a second time)” Larin’s shot was blocked, Davies took a shot The slim lead thickened the plot Cansoc Twitter said “Do we like this? Oh no, we do not! This is not a good game,” Said Cansoc Twitter as David hit the bar “No we do not like it, Not one little bit.” “But look what you did!” meowed the Cat! “Now look at the table! Look at the standings! Look and don’t stop! With three wins in three games, Canada is near the top! You sank the Kittitans hopes Sank them deep into the ocean You’re rising up CONCACAF Herdman’s plan is in motion You won in Basseterre You won here, you won there Take your place in the Gold Cup” Meowed the Cat. “But I like being in the booth. Oh I like it a lot!” Said the Cat in the Booth To those watching the stream “But I will have to go away, I know, I know. But I’ve given you another story About streaming games on CONCACAF Go!”
